Are you my home?

So, we've spent the last three months shopping for our first home. That's inaccurate. 'Shopping' suggests a fun, exciting, positive experience, which is exactly the opposite of how I'd describe our home shopping experience. Our weekends center around open houses, drive-bys, the real estate section of the newspaper, zillow.com and our navigation system. (Hayley is less than inspired by this weekend practice.) The mission? Find an exceptionally affordable home that suits our family, and close on it before November 30th to take advantage of the first time home buyer tax credit incentive. Here's how that's panning out:

Thus far, we've looked at about 40 homes. That doesn't include the other properties we've driven by, creepily peered in windows of, and trespassed into backyards of before determining they weren't a good fit for our family.

Sure, we had a lot of mandatories on our must-haves list, but we thought they were reasonable. One of our must-haves is a big back yard, or... just a moderately sized one. In Michigan, this typically isn't a problem. But here... let's just say if I were spitting watermelon seeds off these backyard patios, they'd likely be hitting a neighbor kid in the face.

We've made offers on three homes.

The first house was a ranch with a small pool in a great neighborhood that had been on the market for a few months. After bargaining for three weeks with the homeowner, we offered him asking price. He verbally accepted, then hours later realized that he didn't want to move anymore, refused to sign our contract and withdrew his home from the market. Awesome.

The second house was a two-level home with a moderately sized back yard in a neighborhood in Hayley's school district. It was a newer home and had everything we were looking for. Unfortunately, the property was a short sale (Realtor code for 'hold onto your pants -- this is going to be the longest home-buying process of your life'). Our offer was the leading offer and the only one being considered by the bank. Unfortunately, while we were waiting for a response the homeowners moved out of the home and took the 3K refrigerator with them (which was included in our contract). Additionally, we noticed a spot of bio-organic growth on the ceiling of the downstairs bathroom. Oh, most importantly, we weren't going to get a response for 90 days which would put us out of the running for our 8K First time home buyers tax credit. Also awesome.

Our most recent moment of house-hunting greatness came last week when we decided to pull our offer on house #2, and make an offer on a third home -- a foreclosure, bank-owned -- that has everything we're looking for except... well, floors. Apparently a rash of trendy homeowners decided that stained concrete floors are an attractive feature. Um, they're not. We'd have to use some of our tax credit to carpet the home. Our offer was low, so we're not exactly expecting to get this Arkansas gem either. But hey... we're on a roll. Why break our awesome house-hunting stride now?

So that's it. Poking around in people's back yards has kept the blog posts lean over the past two months. Say a prayer for us. We'll need them. And as always, we'll keep ya'll posted.

Tie-dye Pajama Pants, Meet Rockin' Pink Thong-Toe Slippers

It's been a few weeks since I've posted, and I'm going to make up for it right here. From the heart of Walmart-y-ville, I bring you "The People of Walmart Blog." It's a blog created by some people who took a trip to Walmart and decided to start saying what all of us were thinking: "Wow, now this is an especially eclectic bunch of shoppers (I wonder where they shop for their outifts...? Oh... Right.)" My team stumbled across this website at work -- and while we found ourselves jaw-dropped and gasping, none of us were really surprised. If these striking consumers are unavailable in a Walmart near you, I can show you where to find some. I've included a disclaimer from the website below as well as a disclaimer of my own. Family, that disclaimer is for you.

Disclaimer from The People of Walmart Blog: This site is not in anyway affiliated with Walmart. If you are looking for Walmart’s official website you can find it by clicking here. This site is simply a satirical social commentary of the extraordinary sights found at America’s favorite store.

People of Walmart was founded in August of 2009 by three friends and roommates after an inspirational trip to Walmart. Let’s face it; we all have seen the people who obviously don’t have mirrors and/or family and friends to lock them in a basement, and they all seem to congregate at Walmart...

Meghan's disclaimer: (you can read more about the idea behind the blog on the "About" page on the website, but I'll forwarn you that it's a little crass -- family, that disclaimer is directed at you).

Instead, I recommend you just visit the "People of Walmart" blog homepage here while you enjoy your mid-morning coffee.

"Pumpkin?" No, no. I said "bumpkin."

I just want to apologize to my parents now for their expenditure on my wedding day limo. This option hadn't occurred to me. The white window flag reads "Just Married" in black magic marker. There's not a lot to say here other than, Cinderella's gonna be really pissed when she comes out of the Walmart and tries to find her stage coach.

SUMMER MOVES

So, allow me to expound on this a bit. In short, Hayley hijacked the blog. When she found out that perhaps there was a website upon which she could be the star, and nearly instantaneously post photos just after taking them, well... this is what happened.

This post was art directed and written by Hayley K-D.

She determined the positioning for each photograph, and titled them (appropriately, or inappropriately... whichever way you want to look at it).

She also titled the post: "Summer Moves" and when she suggested the name it was a little reminiscent of how we brainstorm ideas in Advertising. "Is it... Summer Moves?" Hayley proposed the idea aloud to the group. "Hmm. I think there's something there," says her Creative Director as he scrawls the proposed title on the whiteboard. "Alright, let's go with that then," Hay says confidently. "And let's get that posted to the website pronto."


GO BLUE!!


Summer ROCKS!




Oh NO!!

LIFE ROCKS!!!!

A Dog's Life

If anyone was curious how Polski's adjusting, here's a snapshot.

Silver Dollar City and the 'Marvel'ous Cave Below

A cool(er) weekend brought on visions of cow milking simulations, old-timey frocks and Laura Ingles Wilder. So we headed to Silver Dollar City for a second dose of Southern.

Hayley insisted that we pose like this.



She tried to get Troy to do it too. He wasn't buying.

Turns out that Silver Dollar City was actually built on top of a giant cave network. The dude who discovered the cave thought it was filled with marble and brought many people here to mine the marble out of the cave.

But the miners discovered their bright-brained leader mistook marble for limestone. "Poop!" said the miner... which sparked an idea. In lieu of calling off the dig, they mined a pant load of guano (that's fancy miner-speak for "bat poop") and made it into gun powder. So the next time you get shot, think of how smart you'll feel when you know that you're not only bleeding but you're also covered in bat sh*t.

On that note, let's all go check out the cave.

There were 600 stairs throughout the cave.

Note the equidistant spaces between our heads.

HUGE natural waterfall within the cave. We could not go down to the floor of the waterfall because the floor has recently turned into quicksand. Seriously.

Troy was a little taller than the average cave dweller.

Oh look, a gunpowder-making machine.

Smile, you're in a giant cave!



No, this is not a crooked room. This is the scariest part of the cave. They put you on this slanted horror house "train" with walls that are all at a 45% angle. It crawls up the side of the cave to propel you back to ground level because the incline is too steep to walk up. I did not like this part. And Troy, well, he was just tired of me taking lame pictures.

HEY GUYS! WHO WANTS TO TAKE ANOTHER AWESOME PICTURE WHILE WE WAIT FOR THE TRAIN?!

It's a good thing this guy showed up on time.

Half way through the ride, these guys "robbed" our train. The kid sitting in front of us gave them some old natty popcorn.

I guess when you do the same gig 20 times a day, you start to memorize other people's roles. Half way through their skit the conductor said his own lines, along with those of the other two robbers. By far the funniest part of the train ride.

This is for you, Mom. Rather than complaining that we may not be able to afford to put you in a swanky guest house with a butler, just be happy that we'll have enough money to cover your feet.

So... cute... can't stop... taking... pictures...

The troublemakers.

The goofball.

Bedtime Foiled.

Troy claimed he had an errand to run and he wanted Hay to be ready for bed by the time he got back. After a rigorous teeth brushing and nightime prayers, Troy returned toting a grocery bag stuffed with, well... I think it's obvious.

Hayley, meet Klondike. Klondike, meet your maker.

Hayley's first Klondike bar ever down the hatch and well worth the trade for sleep.

FYI -- Photo Expansion

If you'd like a closer look at the photos posted on the blog, you can just click on them and they'll expand to their actual size so you can see all the details. Wee!

The Natural State

Last weekend Troy scouted out a series of national parks about 20 minutes from our home. We thought it called for a family hike. 1.5 miles through the rock walls and forests that are Arkansas.















King Troy will see you now.





This is an extension of Beaver Lake. The trail led us right to the water.

Hayley pretending to be Tarzan.

Troy pretending to be a little girl afraid of bugs.

Steep inclines made the hike challenging but fun.

We saw a cave up on a hill and scrambled our way upto it.

Troy promised me he wouldn't crawl inside it.

We see how that went.

That's one good lookin' caveman.

A view of the world from Meghan's POV.

Daddy climbing. Hayley in her "Sassy Hiker" pose.

Faux-hawk meets cave-rock.

There's nothing quite as flattering as high-waisted elastic-band shorts.

Smile and say, "Mom Jeans".

The daddy-long-legs were stumbling over each other, falling from the cave ceiling.

Hay preparing for a butt slide down the path.

Love this shot. LOVE.

You can't see the giant valley between mom taking pictures and dad and hay waiting on the other side. Not to mention the fact that the path was all of a single foot-length wide.

That's a wrap.